I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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