Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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