the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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