I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
