he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
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