Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
accomplished twins. life is a go
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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