We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
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