Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
