Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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