Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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