3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
literally had 100 drinks last night.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
