This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Randomize
