In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
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And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
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This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
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