I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
