I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
