i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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