Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
