She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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