One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
