Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize