well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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