it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
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I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
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