I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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