Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
