my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Randomize
