Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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