Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
you win again, gameday.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
