why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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