I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
