talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Randomize
