so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
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