i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
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