As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
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