Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
