Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i just google imaged poop.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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