Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize