He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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