Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
