You just made me feel so damn special
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
