Pants 0. Shit 1.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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