He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
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