Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Randomize
