You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
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