Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
