Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
