I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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