just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
