At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just cut my nipple shaving
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Randomize
