Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize