dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
