i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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