nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
