I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize